You Spend More Time with Your Kids than You Think

A new study shows today's parents spend far more time with their children than previous generations did.

By Kathryn Hawkins. Posted on April 08 2010

iStockphoto image.

If you have kids, you probably agonize over whether you should focus on working hard to make money and provide them with the best possible life, or if it’s more valuable to spend every moment that you can with them. The work-life balance has been a struggle for parents for generations, and it will never be easy to resolve.

But no matter which side of the fence you fall on, here’s some good news if you’re a parent: today’s parents are spending far more time with their children than generations past.

A new study from economists at University of California, San Diego analyzes available data from the last 35 years to measure how much time parents are spending actively engaging with their children, participating in activities such as “taking them to school, helping with homework, bathing them, playing catch with them in the back yard,” one of the study’s authors, Erik Hurst, told The New York Times.

According to the study, today’s college-educated mothers spend an average of 21.2 hours a week actively caring for their children, while women with less education spend an average of 15.9 hours. It’s a striking gain since before 1995, when the standard was just 12 hours.

Dads are spending more time tossing the ball around, too: pre-1995 fathers with college educations only spent about 4.5 hours a week playing with their children. Today, the average has more than doubled, to 9.6 hours a week. For fathers with a high school education, the total has still gone up significantly, from 3.7 hours to 6.8.

These days, the research shows that parents’ priorities have shifted. Most people don’t care as much about keeping a spotless house, or mastering the art of French cuisine, as they once did. And while the occasional late night at the office may be inevitable, many workers are limiting their hours in order to spend time with their families.

Nonetheless, parents “are worried they’re shortchanging their children,” said Ellen Galinsky of the Families and Work Institute. “I’ve never found a group of parents who believe they are spending enough time with their kids.”

But as the new evidence shows, there’s no need to feel guilty. Today’s parents are doing a great job balancing life and work—and even though you may want even more time at home with your children, a Families and Work Institute study shows that your kids don’t care so much about that. They just want you to enjoy the time you do spend with them.

“Kids were more likely to wish that their parents were less tired and less stressed,” Galinsky said.

So when you’re at your son’s soccer game, put the Blackberry away, and cheer him on instead.

Filed under: General Interest,

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